Do you not know?
Have you not heard?
The Lord is the everlasting God,
the Creator of the ends of the earth.
He will not grow tired or weary,
and his understanding no one can fathom.
He gives strength to the weary
and increases the power of the weak.
Even youths grow tired and weary,
and young men stumble and fall;
but those who hope in the Lord
will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
they will run and not grow weary,
they will walk and not be faint.
How can I feel so blessed right now?? I'm exhausted. Elizabeth has had insomnia for the last 5 nights, so she's spent hours popping in and out of bed, and on Saturday night managed to knock over a 7 foot high bookshelf. At 10:30pm. Thank God Ruby slept through it. ...but in a way only Elizabeth has, she didn't know what she was doing and can't explain what in the heck is going on! She's finally asleep now, and so I'm headed there myself, but I need to pause quickly to tell you how well we're doing. Don't get me wrong. This is hard. It's complicated. The girls are coping well, but coping nonetheless. Elizabeth is throwing us for a loop right now and requiring lots of creative parenting. Trips to and from the hospital are tiring, and I'm still working around the clock to provide milk for Ava. We are exhausted.
And yet, it is such a joy to have 4 beautiful girls! We are blessed to get love on each other every day. Matt has a good job, doing what he loves, with a flexible enough schedule that he's not completely burnt out right now. (close, but not quite!!) We have lovely gals willing to spend a chunk of the day with our girls to love on them, feed them and help ease this crazy transition so I can be at the hospital a little each day. What mom of 4 gets to sit and hold her littlest one for hours at a time?? We are so blessed. And while we have no idea how we're going to manage the transition of Ava needing more of me at the hospital before she comes home, and then newborn life here at home in the months to come. We know God is not exhausted by our life :), and will make a way. Elizabeth's strange behavior and symptoms remind us that the possibility of a hospitalization is always "out there", but God knows what is in store, and he will make a way. We don't need to know what is ahead, only that God is for us, He is faithful and we are His. So we'll take every drop of grace available for today, and wake up tomorrow trusting there will be more.
Thank you for your prayers and faithful encouragement. We're so blessed to not be walking this road alone.