Traditions

For Ava's 3rd Birthday, friends gave us their timeshare in Timber Creek, MO, allowing us to began this precious tradition of getting away together. Over time, Ava Day has become a weekend filled with permission to dwell on all the moments we had with our Bean, intentional reflection on the countless ways God has provided for us, and heaps of family time to snuggle, practice our harmonizing while we make and clean up meals, read aloud and PLAY. I always go back and read our blog and remember what God has done. Gosh it's been a crazy journey...and He has truly sustained us.
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Ava Day 2020

Friday night we left the city for our annual weekend to celebrate Ava Day. May 24 marks the day she was born at a mere 2 lbs 11 oz, and the day she died, after only one year with us. We are forever marked by her life and this weekend has become a treasured family time. We gave each of the guests at Ava's first birthday party a peony bulb and have since developed such a love for these delicate, beautiful, fleeting flowers. We usually go see the peonies blooming at the botanical garden, but due to Covid-19, we had to skip that this year....then these beauties greeted us at our friend's home. 💗I'll be posting more pictures and reflections throughout the weekend. If you have memories you'd like to share, I'd love to hear them! 💗

Happy Easter!

What sweet mercy to spend Easter together. We are socially distant and masked up for another week, but at least we're in the same apartment! 😍 since both Matt and I tested positive for COVID, we need to keep Elizabeth a safe distance away for another week, but she's assured us she's having a grand time, (swipe for evidence 🤩) and I think we now see the bigger challenge will be convincing her when it's time to come home. 😅. God is so kind, and we are on the road to complete recovery. Happy Easter friends! He is risen! He is risen indeed!

Looking to the hills...

“I lift up my eyes to the hills. From where does my help come? My help comes from the Lord, who made heaven and earth.”
‭‭Psalms‬ ‭121:1-2‬ ‭

On Thursday afternoon, the girls and I enjoyed #paintingwildflowerslive.  Thursday night I developed a tickle cough and wheezing.  So yesterday morning we had to activate our “worst case scenario” plan to protect Elizabeth in the event both Matt and I got sick. We thought it would be a disaster. We wanted to avoid it at all costs. Yet in the end, there is sufficient, inexplicable grace.

💗I had just laundered the few sets of clothes we have with us in our *annex* apartment, so I donned gloves and a mask and was able to pack Elizabeth easily and send her to stay with dear friends Andrew and @hannah_lou_chandler.  After some initial anxiety and sadness about being separated from Hannah, she rallied and was so brave.

💗in a miracle twist, a friend of a friend who had already had covid and Is now safe from sharing it, took our car and delivered Elizabeth safely, avoiding her the risk of riding Uber. This angel-friend also picked up a box of surgical masks from a neighbor and delivered them to a dr who needs them at his Bronx Hospital. She then took my grocery list and got our refrigerators stocked for at least the next week. What grace.

💗we decided to move Hannah back home, since the front of the house is now clear of germs and Matt’s quarantined in the back.  After a rough start at bedtime, she’s done much better today.  Neither of us will be ok missing those bedtime snuggles, but Ruby is quickly becoming a good stand in.

💗So here we are doing the very thing that a week ago was unthinkable. Both Matt & I seem to have relatively mild symptoms, and are praying for new mercies, sufficient grace and peace that surpasses all understanding for each member of our family.

💗 Gosh I wish this were playing out differently. But even this would be impossible without incredibly generous neighbors who handed over their apartment, extraordinary friends who welcomed Elizabeth with open arms and are loving her well, and if not for the trust muscles ALL of us have developed over years & years of seeing God provide.

A slight delay

“For now we see through a glass, darkly; but then face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know even as also I am known.”
‭‭1 Corinthians‬ ‭13:12‬ ‭(KJV‬‬)

There is so much we don’t understand.

This verse has been whispering in my ear over the past few days, when I wake up, when I lie down at night, and a dozen times in-between.  The window faces west...giving a perfect view of an oncoming storm.

I sit in our neighbor’s cozy quarantine apartment with two healthy girls, and look through this window multiple times a day.  There are beautiful springtime views that catch my attention even through the city grime on the glass, and at other times the sky is cloudy and all looks grey and foreboding.

There is so much we simply can’t see clearly right now. But we don’t have to. That’s not the point. The one who DOES, calls himself our refuge and our strong tower. I look to him and trust, even when I can’t quite make out what’s coming.

We were so looking forward to a family reunion in 4G on Saturday. Ruby has been well and we’re ready to be TOGETHER again.

Sadly, it’s not going to happen this weekend.  Matt has developed wheezing and flu-like symptoms, so we’ve had to start our COVID clock over again.

We definitely didn’t think we’d be spared, but to have this happen while we’re still separated is wearying.

We would covet your prayers for a mild case and quick recovery for Matt, for sweet Rubykins as she is isolated in the front of our apartment, (thankfully with plenty of access to zoom and FaceTime. 🤗 and for wisdom as I parent and shepherd my girls hearts through the disappointment and homesickness we all feel.

Success!

She did it! They were in and out in 20 min, home before Matt's virtual ALS clinic started at 8:30 and we got to spend the afternoon #paintingcats with the incomparable @amanda_evanston. What a treat!

Venturing out

Today Elizabeth had to venture out from our quarantine cocoon to get her blood drawn. Matt took her into the hospital and without touching any surfaces, whisked her in and out so later today her transplant team can make the necessary adjustments to her immunosuppression based on the results. Will you pray for her protection, and specifically for her Tacro levels to be optimal so we can space out her blood draws and limit her COVID19 exposure?

God has sustained her life for 15 years now, and we know he will be faithful to continue.

Coming up for air

Hello! I’m finally coming up for air! 😅 Quarantine has been for us, like it has been for so many. We’ve relished in even more together time with Matt working mostly from home.  We’ve played games, worked some puzzles, read some books, taken a few walks at a safe distance from friendly neighbors. We’ve FaceTimed or Marco polo’d, or zoomed to stay in touch with friends, our church family and our family-family also sheltering in place around the world.  I’ve taken up stress-baking & stress-eating...just to keep balance. 😉

We’ve also struggled to find a rhythm for our new normal...just when I thought I’d found my footing, Ruby spiked a fever on Wednesday night and we found we had to separate her from Elizabeth both for the risk of COVID19 and honestly the risk of ANY exposure to ANYthing now that she’s so immunosuppressed. 

Mercifully, a neighbor on our floor is out of town for the next month, and we were able to schlep ourselves to their apartment! 🙏🏼🙌🏼 Such grace. 

Now we wait. E needs to be away from Ruby for 14 days...so we’re counting down to a week from this Saturday...until then, we FaceTime and zoom and I get coffee delivered to my door every morning by a handsome delivery man. 💗

Social-distancing & an update

It’s been so long since I’ve posted any updates about our family or Elizabeth’s transplant recovery. Honestly, I’ve been battling with low-grade depression since E’s surgery & it’s been easier just put my head down & deal with the urgent needs in front of me.  With COVID-19 in the forefront of all our minds, some of you have been checking in & I wanted to let you know how we’re doing. 

Social distancing has been our middle name since November! After two glorious weeks in February when we got to visit colonial Williamsburg mostly mask-less & attend a class for school IN PERSON...we’re back to our old routine of self-quarantining & keeping Amazon & Instacart in business. 😷. The GREAT news is, Elizabeth is doing brilliantly from a transplant recovery perspective. Following months of tinkering with her meds on a weekly basis, her labs all look  great, & she’s once again gaining weight, & is fully off the additional immunosuppression required for the first 3 months post-transplant.  She got a mild cold and handled it like a champ, so that bodes well! She’s been having a mysteriously high heart rate for a few months now, so we’re investigating that, but all-in-all, she is doing so well. 

Many of you have asked...Matt’s still working in the hospital, but they are pushing off any non-urgent patient visits they can & utilizing tele-medicine whenever possible.  He had his first “possible exposure” experience last week and it really drove home the reality that for him, and us, if feels like it’s only a matter of time. 

I’m not exaggerating when I say this only feels a *bit* different than how we’ve been living for the last 15 years.  So much of our future has been uncertain for so long. “Through many dangers, toils and snares” we have seen God’s daily bread provided so faithfully that we know he will continue to meet us where & when we need him.  We have learned, even without certainty of our future, we have deep & abiding hope & it is our prayer that we can share that peace & toilet paper 🤗 we have with our neighbors during this scary & uncertain time. 

Please pray for our protection & for joy to abound in our home.  How can we pray for you?? 💗